9:21 a.m. - 2009-04-22
The Trouble With Packing
We've been chatting now for a while so I guess it's time I could tell you about the time I lost a suitcase, and exactly how much trouble I was in for doing that. It was a lot, a whole, whole lot. You'd think the suitcase had all of our clothes ever, in it. Or our life savings, for the amount of trouble I got into. But no, the suitcase was empty. It was empty at the time I lost it, but before that, it held....well, it held me. NOW I know you're all wondering...... Okay, already, here goes.
It started in Baltimore Maryland. We were on the first week of a month away from home at that time. I think it was our third hotel room of the week. It was earlyish in our relationship, but not early enough that we hadn't already established some rules and knew we were going to stick with the discipline type of relationship. It was working well for us, though in the midst of this particular problem I wasn't sure that was such a good idea. It is, of course, I wouldn't have it any other way, but you probably should know I can get quite wound up some times when I know Thomas isn't going to be really happy with me. It wasn't too far into that day that I knew Thomas wasn't going to be happy with me. And it took quite a while before I could see him, and longer still before we were finished with the discussion, the spanking, and the rest of the punishment.
Thomas had one of his all day seminars, as usual. We'd come into the city the day before and spent a couple of hours checking everything out. We are usually staying in the middle of the city, close to or at the places where Thomas is planning on speaking. He laid out some general rules, like not catching a ride with a stranger, not taking the train to another state, etc. He used to pretty much allow me to do anything I wanted, but that was changing slowly the longer we were together, and it changed a bit more after this particular outing. Before you go thinking he's suffocating me and all that....I kind of like knowing that there are boundaries and that there is someone that cares enough about me to make sure I stay within them. I've pretty much always had the run of wherever we were growing up. The only time anyone cared where I was was if I happened to inconvenience them. No one cared that I was in one of the cars with the animals until I managed to get the lion ticked off enough to roar.
Guess I need to get back to Baltimore. Thomas had left and I had the whole day ahead of me. I grabbed my suitcase to take with me, in case I found anything that I absolutely had to have. It rolls and is pretty big, so it always worked well getting odd or larger items back to the hotel room. It also makes a nice seat or foot rest if I get tired. I got bored with the stores and buildings and all the people dressed up and walking fast, trying to get too and from the office buildings. I saw some green just down the way and headed for it, finding a very pretty and large park. All green and grassy with trees and even a creek running through the very middle of it.
I sat down on a bench and watched people. You could tell a huge difference between the people on the park's paths versus those on the sidewalks at the edge of the park. The ones inside the park were laid back, happy and relaxed. The ones running down the sidewalk were distracted and busy, most of them with furrowed brows. It didn't take me too long to figure out that they needed a wake up call to stop and smell the roses. Or at least investigate something that doesn't normally appear on a sidewalk.
Remember, I told you the suitcase was big, and I'm not a very big person. I found a college kid laid out on a blanket and paid him $20 to take the suitcase and park it on the sidewalk. Told him that I was doing some research for a college paper (hey, I can at least talk like I've been in school before!) and he'd be a big help if he'd do that. So, as soon as he agreed to it, I opened the suitcase and climbed inside. He was a bit shocked, but he zipped up the case and stood it up, then rolled me out to the sidewalk. Thankfully it wasn't an extremely hot day and I'd had a shower in the morning.
I had warned him not to speak to me, since I didn't want anyone out on the sidewalk to have a clue that I was inside. He dutifully pulled me to a stop and I heard the handle fall back down. I could even hear the first two steps as he walked away, then it was mostly quiet. I slowly readjusted my weight so I wasn't sitting wrong on my ankle and settled in to see how long it would be before someone started investigating this suitcase and I could pop out. It crossed my mind that someone could try and pack me away, thinking the suitcase might contain something valuable, but I figured I'd still have plenty of time to get out before things got too dangerous. There was a small hole where I could stick my finger out of and move the zipper around without any problems.
I was wondering if the college kid was standing in the trees and watching, possibly making people nervous. I was getting ready to open the suitcase and look to see what was going on when I heard a car stop, rather suddenly if you ask me, out in the street. So maybe instead of surprising someone walking by, I WAS going to get picked up and tossed into a trunk. I listened, but couldn't really make anything out. The car moved and I sighed, starting to think that this joke wasn't going to work out the way I had planned.
I know these things take time. I knew I wasn't just going to hop in the suitcase and two or three minutes later I'd get my chance. I was prepared to wait a short while, as long as it didn't get too hot in there, or my legs started to fall asleep. So when things went a bit quiet, I settled in to keep waiting. My quiet was disturbed not a minute later by some sirens. They were in the distance, but it sounded like quite a few of them and it had me wondering if there was a building that was going up in flames. That would be a tad more exiciting that what I was currently doing. The sirens went silent and then a moment later I heard what sounded like a diesel truck come to a stop not too far away. Good, I thought, here's another chance at success.
Yeah! The footsteps were headed in my direction. I could tell there was more than one person so this was going to be even better. What was weird about it is that they were close but no one was touching the suitcase. I waited, but still no one came closer. Then there appeared to be a few more people arrive. I could tell they were talking but not really hear what they were saying. Then I heard something I was familiar with. A dog, sniffing around the suitcase. Okay, if I couldn't scare the crap out of a human being, I could at least scare a dog. I sniffed loudly, twice, and could tell the dog stopped to listen. Then I barked a couple of times and all hell broke loose.
When I say all hell, I mean it. The dog must have thought I was going to kill him, so he dove in to kill me first. There was never so much growling and biting and slobbering going on in all my life. That dog was strong and the suitcase was no match for him. It fell on it's side and I didn't even get a chance to try and open the case and get away from the murderous dog before there were people yelling and screaming. I've never been so scared in all my life! The next thing I knew I was dragged from my suitcase and slammed to the ground and it felt like everyone in the vicinity was sitting on my back or legs or head and twisting my arms in all directions. I wasn't trying to fight, I just had NO idea what was going on and could only just hope and pray my death was a quick one.
The next five minutes were a complete blurr. I don't know if that happens to everyone in a panicked situation, but I have no idea what happened. One minute I was in the suitcase. The next I remember was everyone sitting on me. The next I was on the floor of a van, face down and with my arms cuffed behind me. How I got to the police station, and how I was brought in still escapes me. I just remember sort of waking up in a small windowless room, with a police officer sitting across from me.
I have no idea how long I was actually there, nor whether I ever made any sense. I remember being asked SO many times what was I doing, and why, and was I working with anyone else. I know they must have thought I was some kind of weirdo, I cried most of the time when they were questioning me. It was different people, some nice, some not so nice, and they all kept asking me the same things, as if I'd come up with a different story another time.
I kept asking them to call Thomas, but they said that would be done later. I asked for him again, once, and tried to explain he was an attorney and he could explain everything, and they walked out and left me alone. I had no idea what time it was and if they were going to interrupt Thomas's meeting, but I didn't care. He was just going to have to be mad at me, but I seriously needed him there whether he was mad or not.
I had my head down on my arms and I heard the door open. Wondering if this was the janitor of the police department, since I swear everyone employed as an officer had been in to question me, I just mumbled "It was a stupid game."
"Yes, it was." I turned and buried my face into Thomas's stomach, arms wrapped tightly around his waist. I'd have probably cried like a baby if I had had any tears left. I heard Thomas talking to someone, then he told me to turn and listen to the Sargeant. I looked at him, and heard him telling me he was sorry for the confusion but that they had to take any and all threats seriously, especially after 9/11. I didn't care what he was saying, but I shook his hand when Thomas prompted me to, and then after a stop to pick up my things, we left the police station.
The rest of that evening passed by in a blur. It was a much nicer blur than earlier, but no less confusing when trying to remember. There was a long and hot bath. Thomas found some scrapes and dressed those with antibacterial goo and bandaids. There was some dinner, from room service. Something hot and easy to eat, that Thomas ended up mostly feeding me. Some quiet tv that I could hear, curled up next to him in bed that night. Then sleep. It was a long and dreamless sleep, and I woke up the next morning and it was already quite light outside. I sat up quickly, thinking I missed Thomas before he headed out to speak. I didn't get a chance to feel too badly before he came over and sat on the side of the bed.
"Good morning sunshine."
"Morning. Aren't you....supposed to be speaking?"
"No," Thomas said, putting a hand on my knee. "Today we're supposed to be traveling on to Silver Springs, which is probably going to make the police very happy." Last night came crashing back in a rush.
I could feel that horrible blush creeping up from my toes. I scrambled out of bed and grabbed my jeans. "Look, I'm really sorry. I don't know what I was thinking but I'll head out - OW!"
"Sit down."
"I know what - ow! OW!"
"Sit. Down."
I sat, if only to get away from those smarting swats he'd landed before I even had my jeans up. I sat on the side of the bed, my jeans around my ankles.
"Look at me, and listen - closely." There was a REALLY long and nerve wracking pause. "There isn't anything that you can do that will leave me wanting you to leave, especially without talking about it first."
"I stopped traffic......." I said, unable to go further.
"There isn't anything that you can do that will leave me wanting you to leave. Is that clear?"
I nodded dumbly.
"If you try and tell me that again in the future, I'm going to wash your mouth out. If you skip the whole telling me part, and just leave, I will spend every hour of every day trying to find you. And when, not if, but when I find you, as soon as I finish kissing every inch of your body, I'm going to give you a spanking that'll leave you on your stomach for a month."
I don't know if you've ever felt it, but that was one of those moments where it felt like Thomas had pulled my belly button closer to my spine from the inside of me. Yes, it was a very serious threat, and I knew he meant it. But what he was REALLY saying was that I was worth chasing if I left. That was the part that really had my insides twisting.
"Yes, sir," I managed, and meaning it.
"Then we need to discuss yesterday. Do you want breakfast before, or after?"
"I can't eat," I said truthfully.
"Come into the living room," Thomas said, holding out a hand. "Leave the jeans, you won't be needing them."
I got up and put my hand into his and let him tow me out of the bedroom and into the living room. It was warmer there, the early morning sun having been on that side of the building since it broke the horizon.
I sat where he pulled me, swallowed up by the cushions on the sofa. He pushed the remote off to the side and took a seat on the coffee table across from me.
"I know I was stupid, trying to scare people -"
"Shush Chance. You are NOT stupid, and I'm not going to allow you to say so. What you did yesterday wasn't the smartest thing you could do, but you aren't stupid and neither were your actions. Do you know why such a big deal was made out of it?"
"Not really, no."
"Everyone is a lot more nervous now about finding unexplained packages in places they're not expecting them. Before the terrorists attacked us that September, people didn't have to believe that there could be terrorists among us. Those types of attacks happened in other countries, but not here. When it was made apparent that that wasn't the case, people lost their trust and a lot of things that wouldn't have bothered anyone, now bring out a response far greater than they warrant. A policeman saw a suitcase sitting there without an owner. Instead of thinking that it was left there accidentally, it now becomes a very real threat in his eyes."
I think Thomas could tell I had never thought of that. My throat was closed and I was having trouble blinking the unshed tears out of my eyes. He took my hands and kept going.
"He saw a threat, and immediately started trying to protect the public by stopping traffic and setting up a parameter, bringing in an explosives dog and and all that. When you popped out of the suitcase, he had no idea whether you were friend or foe and he's going to err on the side of caution. You didn't do anything awful by trying to have fun with people - it just wasn't a very well thought out plan you had."
I shook my head no. Of COURSE I didn't think through more than trying to scare someone. It wasn't until things actually started to happen that I even had a clue it wasn't cool, and until Thomas explained it all when I had time to stop and think about it did I realise how very uncool it really was. "I ...I'm sorry," I said, knowing how inadequate those words were.
"I know, and I appreciate that, but there are so many other things you could have done with yesterday that didn't include trying to scare someone just to see their reaction. There are many other ways to meet and talk to people that don't involve silly stunts that can go horribly wrong. That's the part I want you to remember and why I'm going to paddle you."
"Paddle?" I asked, my stomach tying itself into knots, rather than just shaking in anticipation.
"Yes, paddle," he said, standing up and pulling me up from the safety of the couch. I pulled back a little, just to let him know I wasn't exactly excited about this new development, but knowing I had really caused a lot of problems yesterday. I saw the paddle on the table as I waited for him to pull a chair out.
"Please, I promise not to do anything like that again," I tried, knowing it was in vain but my mouth was working independently of my brain. As I expected, Thomas still pulled me across his lap and pulled my shorts down. I tried turning around, but his hands prevented me from going far.
"Please! I don't want to be paddled!"
"I'm sure you don't, but that's my call and as I don't want to have to do this again, I'm going to make it a bit more memorable this time."
With that, he quit talking and started spanking. I didn't last long, even though I told myself I wasn't going to cry, at least until he picked up the paddle. I had been on the verge of tears since I'd been sitting on the couch and it didn't take long for them to force their way past the knot in my throat and come pouring out. So much for taking it like a man. I felt about three and half and know I sounded just about that age too. My first few moans, while about three octaves higher than my normal speaking voice, were at least actual words. What came after that was the good, old fashioned blubbering one did when the pain kept building in waves too hot to handle. I was lost in that fog, having lost awareness of space and time and anything else besides the painful heat that was radiating behind me when I felt the first swat of the paddle. I didn't actually hear the swat, but rather the silence than rang out immediately after it, when my breath caught in my throat and my head struggled to comprehend the very new and sharp pain that had just exploded on what had already been extremely tender skin. The second swat I heard, and then I'm sure anyone in the hallway of the hotel heard my reaction to it, as I emptied my lungs in a howl of pain while trying to levitate from Thomas's lap. The third and fourth swats came down without mercy, and I howled twice more, certain that I was going to be rushed to the hospital in need of skin grafts. I struggled for a moment or two before I realised that Thomas was finished and I collapsed and sobbed hard, my head throbbing in time with my demolished backside.
When the steel clamps finally released, rather than standing up I slid to my knees and tried to catch my breath. Thomas was firm in my ear, telling me settle down and breathe. I listened to him, and tried to follow, but it was too hard. He helped me up and I found myself facing the corner, his hands on my shoulders.
"Calm down. This isn't the end of the world. Take a breath. Hold it. Let it go. Again."
I followed his instructions and was able to stop the worst of the crying. I heard him say "Good boy," and got a gentle pat on the back before he left me to finish calming down. No, it wasn't the end of the world, but it was about the smallest corner of it, a beige slate in front, and blossoms of red and firey yellow behind me. It seemed like forever that I was there, and I had no clocks to tell me I was wrong when I heard a knock on the door. I risked a look across the room, seeing Thomas open the door only wide enough for him to go out, and a moment later, seeing the front end of a cart come through before I turned back to the wall. I was sure that Thomas didn't allow anyone to see in, as they'd get an eyefull of a seriously well spanked behind. A few moments later, I finally heard Thomas.
"Come here."
I turned away from the wall, extremely grateful for being able to see anything other than the same four inches of beige wall. Thomas was sitting where I had been earlier, in the corner of the couch with a breakfast spread out in front of him on the coffee table. I sat down in his lap, spending a few minutes with my head buried in his neck, apologizing again for the mess that was yesterday. I didn't feel like eating, but chewed and swallowed everything that Thomas gave me, thankful that he was nice enough to situate me with very little of my bottom in direct contact with his legs. After breakfast, we cuddled for a while longer.
After I apologized for the fifteenth time, Thomas surprised me.
"I'm sorry for yesterday too."
"You are?" I asked, confused.
"Yes. I don't think I helped matters by letting you run around the cities as I worked. It's been hard for me, knowing you're out and about but not knowing what you're actually doing, or if you're taking care of yourself. I know you come from the streets and can take pretty good care of yourself, which is why I've been hesitant to say anything. But it's my job to take care of you now, and I'm not helping anything by not giving you boundaries. That's changing today."
"What do you mean?" I asked, secretely pleased with his choice of words.
"What I mean is, you're not going to be free to do whatever you want while I'm working. I want to know what you're going to do, where and when, and all that."
There was more to that conversation, but it isn't what you may think. There hadn't ever been anyone in my life that had cared enough to set boundaries for me before. The closest I had ever come to having a boundary before was just remembering who I had last pissed off, and trying to stay out of their way until they'd forgotten about whatever it was that I had done. My mom never cared where I was, as long as it wasn't underneath her feet whenever a hot prospect came along. So having boundaries was kind of comforting.
That month started off rough. I felt that spanking acutely that day, and a bit the next, a very real reminder to think before doing something that might need thinking about before doing. Thomas kept me busy for most of the rest of that trip. What little freedom I did get, wasn't exactly freedom of the sort I had before. I had to stay in touch with Thomas by phone, texting him about what I wanted to do, and waiting for him to have a few minutes to text me back with an okay. For some people, that might have been too restrictive. For me, it was a new experience, and one that I relished as much as I could, without actually coming right out and telling Thomas I thought it was awesome that he cared enough about me to want to know everything I was doing. The part I didn't like was the addition of the paddle to the arsenal of Thomas for when I went a little beyond bad. That was a very new experience, and one that I did work hard for a while to avoid. I guess I just forgot exactly how badly it stung, at least until the first swat landed again. Then I remembered exactly what it was all about and wished the whole time I could forget again. What's a guy to do, behave all the time? Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha......
Ta ta for now!
0 comments
12:46 p.m. - 2009-02-23
Ikea
It warmed up for a few days. Not really warm, but at least not blowing snow and below zero. I think it's going to get cold and snow again, but that seems to be normal around here.
Chicago is a good city, but it's a little less fun when its this cold. People don't stick around much outside at the shopping areas, nor the parks. Looking forward to spring and watching everyone start to fill all the open spaces. I love to people watch, been doing it all my life. I also like to play games with them, whether they know I'm doing something to them or not. Traveling around with the circus, you do become quite a people person.
We took a taxi over to Ikea yesterday, as Claire wanted to get Kylie a dresser thing but didn't have the time to travel down and get it herself. Thomas volunteered to pick it up and we'll deliver it the next weekend to Kylie at school.
Ever been to an Ikea? It's quite an experience, and one I love. Had I had the money, and knew what an Ikea was before I met Thomas, I'd have probably filled up whatever room I had at the time with their furniture and lights and stuff. You can go CRAZY there with fancy EVERYTHING for your house. All different kinds of lights in all shapes and sizes and hanging ability. I can go and spend an entire day there by myself, which I've done on several occasions whenever Thomas has been busy. I've actually been asked to leave once or twice before. It wasn't because I was being destructive or criminal or anything, no way. I'd just sort of moved into a room or two, depending upon my mood. I set up in a kitchen once. Went through the store with a cart and picked out some cooking dishes, some to eat on, glassware, silverware, that sort of thing. All for one of course. I picked my favorite kitchen room and spread my items out into the area and played house. Oh, I didn't actually cook there, since they don't run electricity and water exactly in order to USE the appliances, but I did get my dinner over at their cafeteria and just dressed it up with my new dishes and silverware. Customers just didn't know WHAT to do when I acted offended because they just bounced right into my kitchen in the midst of dinner, without even being offered an invitation or bringing a bottle of wine! Other's just walked by with their hands over their mouths, talking to their friends about how weird it was that Ikea not only had sets, they had actors.
Another time, I moved into this section they had labeled as a 500 square foot house. It was tiny, like some of the apartments in New York City, but it was fabulous as far as furnishing was considered. I'd never seen so much stuff packed into such a small space, yet it didn't feel like a box. That was a bit more fun than the kitchen, since those were more open. The 500 square foot house had walls and doors and you really had to go into and out of the area, without any real open walls that people could see you through. So I'd go and sit in the bedroom and mess with the people that wandered through. Sometimes I was stretched out on the bed with a book, reading, and I'd pull a blanket up like they caught me naked. Some people would just hurry out, as if they'd really disturbed me. Others would huff and take a moment to look before leaving. This one particular day i think was a day that the kids were off school. There were LOADS of them running wild and I messed with them a lot. You can SO play with them on their level. I'd sit on the end of the bed with a huge pout on, and when they'd ask me what I was doing, I'd tell them I said a bad word to my mom and she sent me to my room until my dad got home. I could have pretty long conversations with them about how much trouble I was in, and then if a large man came through the set, I'd tell them that was my dad and they'd better hurry out before he came in. You've never seen such bug eyes on the kids and they'd run out without a word.
Other times, I'd stand in the corner and wait to see if anyone said anything to me. I'd tell them my mother worked over in lamps and that I broke something there, so she was making me stand in the corner in a room that didn't have as many breakable things.
There was a cute girl one time in the lighting area. She had to be about my age and pretty shy. These two teenaged boys were being rude and I could tell that she was really feeling bad. Once they moved on, I grabbed this light fixture that had a bare bulb in it but no shade, and I sang to her. Wondering what song I sang? Yes, I know, I can be ridiculous sometimes. You light up my life. I sang that song ALL the way through, into that ridiculous lamp that worked as my microphone. She turned about fifteen shades of red and tried to escape several times, but I kept blocking her exits and she didn't know what to do with herself. We attracted quite a bit of attention, and I got a short round of applause when I finished. The best thing was, even though it was still shy, she did give me a smile.
Our shopping trip was quick though. Thomas is not a lot of fun when it comes to shopping. As far as he was concerned Ikea was in business solely to sell us a Hemnes mirror chest in black/brown on that particular day. He did NOT see icicle lights that you could hang in the middle of your room and stretch out six lengths of them to the far reaches of your ceiling. Nor did he see the fabulous screen that you could separate larger rooms with that was on sale for $100 less than it's original price. He was further not interested in the green wrought iron bench with matching plant pots that would have looked wonderful on our postage stamp-sized lawn. And when I tried to clamber through an excellent looking pup tent thing for kids, he was waiting on the other side with a stern word about coming along with him and not disappearing into side aisles and pop up tents and kitchenettes along the way. When I got bored of perusing the very large shelves for the particular box he was interested in, I pushed off with a foot and rode our flatbed cart along the aisle until a post happened to appear out of nowhere and caused the cart to stop dead while I kept going until I ALSO stopped dead against the post. At that point, the cart decided to reverse direction and make it's way back with it's tail between it's legs to where Thomas was and I was left with a small bump that thumped on my head, which was soon joined by a thump that bumped on my rump, placed there by Thomas. That was the end of the fun, which didn't take long because Thomas was done shopping in about five minutes.
The most fun came when we headed back outside to wait for our taxi. We escorted our box down to where the taxis stop, which was past some of the parking. There was one of these HUGE trucks, black, that was parked there. I don't remember the brand, but I know the edition because it was utterly ridiculous. It was the Big Horn edition, complete with the big horns as a hood ornament. I wish we could have waited for the guy to come out, because I KNOW he had a really small dick. You'd have to if you felt you needed to ride around in THAT horrid vehicle. Anyway, it was black and because of all the recent snow, it was also all kinds of dirty. SO dirty in fact, that when I added one letter to the edition name with a wet finger, it could be clearly seen. Our taxi arrived before they came out, in fact before anyone could have noticed what I'd done. I'd have sat in the cold for hours if that is what it took, to see the reaction to what it said. Thomas of course didn't wait, we were DONE shopping so of course the next obvious step in the process was to go straight home. I really wanted to see what they thought of driving around in the Big Horny edition of the truck.
(snicker)
Ta ta for now!
0 comments
8:55 a.m. - 2009-02-12
Not so cold now
I reread what I posted last time - sorry about that! I found out I was actually coming down with something. Not too long after I signed off I was praying to the porcelin gods. I just figured I had drunk too much tea, but I got sick again later and never could warm up. Thomas came home and promptly freaked out. My temperature was 101 (I guess that's not good?) and I got fed a tiny amount of water and a couple of tylenol which managed to stay down all of five minutes. Then Thomas got rude and I was given a couple of tylenol that stayed....in. I was then relegated to bed and checked on every five minutes. I've heard that you can't get sleep in hospitals because of all the poking and checking to see that you're alive. Wondering if I would have slept better there than with Thomas!
I didn't get any food that night. Got sips of water here and there and lots of cold compresses while I shivered and burned up in no particular order. Trying to tell Thomas to go away so he wouldn't catch it didn't work. I had a lovely breakfast of dry toast and electolyte enhanced drink, which did, thankfully, stay put. I felt gross all that next day but I was mostly ok. Fever finally settled down at some point, but it didn't 'break' like I've heard it can. No obvious signs it quit. Took a shower, I felt disgusting after all of that and now I feel somewhat human. Thomas is insisting that I only have thirty minutes I can sit up and play online with. Not exactly all that much time, but I'll humor him. He's old, you know. Can't take too much excitement.
Also been told that I'm not going out under ANY circumstance whatsoever for the next day or two. When I pointed out I'd prefer to run outside than burn to death in a fire, he said the only fire I needed to be afraid of was the one he'd set on me if I went out. NOT FUNNY. Guess I'll skip the candles with tomorrow's bath so I don't have to worry about that.
I don't like being sick, but it's something that happens. Living in close quarters with a bunch of performers and other odds and ends that would show up and share germs with us, meant that I pretty much caught whatever was going around. I'd just hunker down and let it get on and when I felt like I could eat, I would. Thomas, on the other hand, is a real.....
I won't say wimp. He's not really a wimp but he really hates getting sick. If he has a headache, he takes tylenol as quick as he can. If he's got indigestion, he's got a tablet for that. And if he does wind up with something worse, he's on the phone with his mother and getting hints for home remedies from her. The world might actually come to an end if he's the one throwing up. I tried taking care of him a couple of times, but he prefers to moan and groan in peace. Thankfully, he doesn't get sick much. Sometimes I wonder how, since I still catch things at about twice or three times the rate he gets them.
He got sick once with the flu. I didn't stand a chance and was sick a day later. He called his mom and whined to her and she came down the next day and took care of us. She makes some really kick-ass chicken noodle soup. I threw that up the first time, but it was so good I tried again an hour later and kept it down. That was the turning point for me, though it took a week before I felt 100%. Thomas, on the other hand, refused to eat that day. He should have been about a day ahead of me in getting well, but you'd think I was the one that started it all. I spent the rest of that day on the couch until Claire told me I really had better go to bed. I really felt like crap, but it was better talking to her than feeling like crap in another room. I headed off to bed, trying not to bother Thomas when I climbed in. I could hear Claire out in the kitchen as I drifted off to sleep.
Claire had made some more chicken noodle soup, then made some sort of vegetable concoction that was excellent too. Thomas refused to get out of bed until his mom went and told him off about getting something to eat and drink. I think he was afraid of throwing up, though he'd had nothing but water for a day and a half. He left his lair and joined us for a few hours that day, and ended up being a lot more human the next. His mom left, but only after making us yet more soup, this time a potato and corn chowder type thing. Thomas didn't want to eat anything that might upset him, which was fine by me as I didn't really want to share that last one!
From reading things in the discipline community, I wasn't sure I should post that. It seems like those in charge in discipline relationships need to be the strong ones, and all the time strong. Thomas is good, but facing sickness isn't one of his strong points. I think it's because he was the oldest and maybe the only time he got babied was when he was sick. Kind of make you want to be a bit sicker if it was .. rewarding. Its not like he was treated bad ever when he was at home. It's just my guess on why he's the way he is when he's sick.
Ugh. My thirty minutes are up. I'd rather like to stay but I don't think Thomas needs a workout. I know I'd rather not get one.
Ta ta for now!
0 comments
12:41 p.m. - 2009-02-09
It's coooollldddd
It's freezing cold here. I mean seriously, deep freezer cold. And windy, which I explained in an earlier post I could do without! When it brings snow in gusts but it doesn't really hang around, that's not good either.
I like snow. I didn't get to be around too much of it when I was a kid, so I'm just starting to appreciate it now. Thomas doesn't like it much, mostly because it always made things hard for him whenever it snowed. They didn't get too many snowdays, which meant either his mom or his dad had to drive them out to get them to school, and if they had any chores that needed doing around on the farm, it took longer and was much colder.
Before you start thinking that Thomas and his brothers and dad went all over the farm and fed all the cows and milked them or whatever they did, it wasn't like that. They had a farm manager and workers who handled all that, but because they had such a large area of land, they were able to have big animals as pets. They had a couple of horses for a while, and various other things. Kylie tells me she had a pet pig after she read Charlottes web or something like that. She hit me when I asked if she enjoyed her bacon sandwich when Charlotte died. Don't ask me, I didn't name the pig. I just can't see Kylie out in the mud playing with a pig. Maybe that's why she became a clothing designer, to forget her sordid past. LOL
Sitting here and just COLD. I have on shorts and a tshirt, sweat pants and a sweat shirt, two pairs of socks and I'm wrapped in a blanket. You'll have to excuse my typing, I feel like I'm shivering. I THINK I'm on my fourth mug of tea, trying to get that to warm me inside. Just takes a while for the tea to cool off enough that I don't burn myself swallowing, then it's like trying to chug it in five minutes before it's cold again. I've checked the heater, it's on and says its 68 in here but I think the wind just blows right through the walls and takes all the heat out.
Thomas is at work. Tried to talk him into staying home because he kept saying he really didn't want to go outside in that weather, but he went anyway. He'd feel guilty if he let his employees get to work and he stayed home because it was cold. I was going to go out myself, but the blast of wind that came in the front door as Thomas left changed my mind. We've had so much blowing snow lately you end up feeling like you've been sandblasted if you get outside for any length of time at all. Makes wandering over to and waiting on the train an unfun prospect.
Can't find anything good on tv. Die Hard is on for the 1,000th time. I've seen it about 999 and I really do like it, but I think that's probably enough for now. When you can pretty much quote the movie word for word, it's probably time to change the channel. Backdraft started again, and that's another movie I've seen one too many times. Movie channels galore and movies in the millions and they seem to show the same three each week.
STILL freezing. Going off to take a bath.
Back now. That was a little weird. I turned the water on, the same spot on the dial I usually use and filled the tub. Got in and the water wasn't hot at all. Tried adding hot water but that just filled up the tub but didn't seem to warm me up any. Didn't stay long. Now I feel colder still, probably because of my wet hair. Turned the heat up a few degrees and got a second blanket and we'll keep trying to type. Maybe that movement will keep my fingers from freezing solid.
It isn't even noon yet! Here I started a post without a clear idea of what to say, I can't find a single thing on tv to watch and I can't warm up. I hope my boring day doesn't lose you as a reader!
Okay, sitting here isn't helping things. I think I've had too much tea, my stomach isn't feeling too good and I'm still freezing. I'll try to be more coherent and warm on the next post.
tttt-ttta ta for now.
0 comments
10:44 a.m. - 2009-01-24
Chaos
It's day 10 of the new year and I'm still (mostly) unmarked. Garfield's advice is working. ;)
I kept thinking and thinking about how to write what's in my head. It works SO much better in person I'm sure, but I doubt very seriously that I'll meet any of you on my travels. If I even met you I don't think I could connect faces and names to screen names, besides, I'd get tired of telling the same story over and over.
I mentioned that I'm trying to get my GED. Thomas is trying so hard to get me to make goals and to follow through. I get it, I understand why that might work but I'm having serious problems with settling down to study. I DO want to learn, and I feel like on some things I learn pretty quickly but trying to either sit in a class and listen/take in what the teacher is saying, or trying to read this book and study on my own is just too difficult. I've rarely been in a classroom situation and trying to learn new habits at 20 is like trying to train your cat to come when you call it. Kylie doesn't seem to have problems in her studies but I know she really loves what she's going to school for.
Okay, let me try this. If it doesn't work at least you'll get the idea. Try talking this over in your own head and I'm sure it'll be lots funnier. It was a while ago and I was watching tv and just caught the end of a conversation. Someone was talking about kayoss in the streets. That was a word I hadn't heard and didn't know the meaning of, and since the story changed, I thought I'd do the intellectual thing and look it up in the dictionary that lives on the shelf in the office. I pull that out and look for kayoss. Then I look for kaioss. Then I look for keyoss, in case that's it. Surely it'll show up soon. Now I'm getting pissed, because I'm trying to do a good thing by looking up a word I don't know, and I'm all set to impress Thomas with a new bit of knowledge and how I actually gained that knowledge. I can't find it ANYWHERE. So I start at K and keep going, looking at every single K in the dictionary. Not one of them look or sound like kayoss. I've now lost an entire HOUR looking for a stupid word! Thomas picks just that moment to come in. I hear him open the door and go into the kitchen. Not a word to me. I hear him go into the bedroom. Not a word to me. The bathroom. Back to the kitchen. It's as if he doesn't even care that I'm here. When he finally comes to the door, it's not a nice welcome.
"Hey hon. Whatcha doing?"
"I heard a word earlier that I didn't know. I thought I'd look it up and educate myself, but this fucking useless piece of shit book ISN'T HELPING!" I could hear my tone getting higher and higher but there wasn't anything I could do about it. No, it wasn't smart, or nice, and that wasn't the worst of it. The worst of it was that I chucked the book in Thomas's general direction. I wasn't mad at him, it was just that he picked the exact wrong time to ask me what I was doing. Since I'd already worked myself into a lather about not finding the word I wanted, he was the easiest thing to blow up at.
When Thomas stepped back into the room, I knew I was in trouble.
"Pick the book up, right now." He had that look turned on, and his voice was his cool, conversational tone. I was still hopping mad.
"I -" was all I got out.
"If you know what's good for you, you'll get that book without a word."
I knew enough that I went and got the book. Not all that calmly or nicely, but I got up and picked it up. Thomas held out his hand and I gently put the book into his hand. He's got lightening quick hands and I didn't want one of them to land on my backside.
"Kitchen."
I sidestepped Thomas, careful to face forward at all times to avoid those hands. I made it into the kitchen ahead of him, not sure where this was going. Thomas pulled out a chair, which isn't a good sign, but he didn't sit down.
"Have a seat."
I sat.
Thomas sat down too, with the book.
"Want to tell me what this is all about?"
"I'm so stupid I can't even look -"
"You know exactly what I think about calling yourself stupid. You're in enough hot water. I'd think long and hard about leaving the self criticism out."
"I couldn't find a word," I amended, though sounding no less angry.
"What word?" he asked, choosing to ignore my angry tone.
"It doesn't matter," I spat.
"Do I need to rephase my question in morse code on your bare bottom?"
Go ahead and laugh. And NO, I'm not laughing with you.
"Kayoss."
"Chaos? You were trying to look up chaos?"
"Yes. Told you I was -"
"I'm not warning you again."
I waited. Not saying anything. Wishing I had a sock for myself and that he'd go back to asking questions rather than LOOKING.
"It's no wonder you're having problems. That's a very confusing word."
"Why? Kayoss, K-A-Y-O-S-S. Except it's NOT in the book."
"Chaos. C-H-A-O-S."
"C - H? Then why is it a 'K' sound rather than 'chhuuuhh' like cheese?"
"It's an old word, from the fifteenth century if I'm not mistaken, and with Latin roots. There just are some words out there in our language that are quirky, and this is one of them. Everyone stumbles on these words at some point in their life and there are a lot of people that don't take the time to actually look up words. I'm very proud of you for doing that."
"It didn't help," I said, a lot more calmly.
"You know how to spell it now, so I think it did help."
Don't go thinking I got off scott free. Am still fully spank-free this year, but I had to look up the definition and write it out 25 times as punishment for throwing the book. I absolutely refuse to write it here, since I've already written it 25 times. But you probably should go read it so you understand Thomas and why I still don't think he's too funny.
We were cuddled up on the couch later, making up. I found out he had been quiet when he came home because he had a headache. I felt even worse for making him dodge a flying dictionary, so I was doing what I could to make him feel better.
NOT FUNNY. Neither Thomas NOR Merriam-Webster.
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/chaos
0 comments
